I have found the bright spot of having a terrible sinus infection-- it's my husband doing the dishes (well, two bright spots.... if you count the inability to taste anything, therefore seeing no point to eating much, inadvertantly losing weight (score)). But I HATE dishes. I always have, and I always will. Ever since I've been sick, he has kept up on the dirty AND clean ones in the dishwasher like a champ! Not to mention the cups of tea he's preparing me daily, and also offering to make me food at any given time. He will make a wonderful mother someday.
In addition to his awesomeness with this sinus infection, he is also willing to accompany me to the hospital tomorrow, where I will be receiving a much-anticipated biopsy of some lump inside my neck ("sexy" doesn't begin to describe the internal workings of my body). I, being utterly terrified of needles (particularly ones that are long and will be going into my throat-al region), have been having minor panic attacks just THINKING about this procedure. So, today I called the doctor's office for a step-by-step tutorial of how this procedure will work... realizing that I'm making a much bigger deal of this than it needs to be. And I must say, after the phone call, I don't feel the slightest bit better.
"Prepare yourself for a shot of novocain in your neck," the nurse said. (Oh, ok. I'll get right on that. By the way, doesn't novocain burn like a blow torch?) "Then, the doctor will insert a long needle into your neck in order to suck out part of the nodule." (How long are we talking, here? Inches? Feet?! I need to know the circumference of this needle, for the love of God!!!) "We won't remove the entire lump, just enough to biopsy it." (Naturally. It only makes sense to have to do this a second time in order to remove the other half of the "lump". Good call, Doc.) "And the neat part is (I'm sorry, did you say "neat"?) that you can watch all of this on a video camera next to your examination bed." (Truly, truly? Bring on the laughing gas or restraining straps, sister, 'cause there's only two ways this thing is going down....) "After the procedure, you'll feel like you've been punched in the throat and will have a bit of a hole with a bruise in your neck, but all in all, you'll be ready to go to work that day!" (Seriously? Lady, will you come home with me and read me a bedtime story? Because you have an incredibly soothing way with words.) And what part of that makes me ready for work? Could it be the hole in my neck? Or possibly the feeling of being punched? At least my loving hubby will be with me.... I'd much rather be restrained by someone I love than a complete stranger.
In addition to his awesomeness with this sinus infection, he is also willing to accompany me to the hospital tomorrow, where I will be receiving a much-anticipated biopsy of some lump inside my neck ("sexy" doesn't begin to describe the internal workings of my body). I, being utterly terrified of needles (particularly ones that are long and will be going into my throat-al region), have been having minor panic attacks just THINKING about this procedure. So, today I called the doctor's office for a step-by-step tutorial of how this procedure will work... realizing that I'm making a much bigger deal of this than it needs to be. And I must say, after the phone call, I don't feel the slightest bit better.
"Prepare yourself for a shot of novocain in your neck," the nurse said. (Oh, ok. I'll get right on that. By the way, doesn't novocain burn like a blow torch?) "Then, the doctor will insert a long needle into your neck in order to suck out part of the nodule." (How long are we talking, here? Inches? Feet?! I need to know the circumference of this needle, for the love of God!!!) "We won't remove the entire lump, just enough to biopsy it." (Naturally. It only makes sense to have to do this a second time in order to remove the other half of the "lump". Good call, Doc.) "And the neat part is (I'm sorry, did you say "neat"?) that you can watch all of this on a video camera next to your examination bed." (Truly, truly? Bring on the laughing gas or restraining straps, sister, 'cause there's only two ways this thing is going down....) "After the procedure, you'll feel like you've been punched in the throat and will have a bit of a hole with a bruise in your neck, but all in all, you'll be ready to go to work that day!" (Seriously? Lady, will you come home with me and read me a bedtime story? Because you have an incredibly soothing way with words.) And what part of that makes me ready for work? Could it be the hole in my neck? Or possibly the feeling of being punched? At least my loving hubby will be with me.... I'd much rather be restrained by someone I love than a complete stranger.
First of all; thank God you still have your humor; when thats gone your really in trouble girl. Secondly, so you can take a serious procedure and turn it into a comedy act so when you come home all freaked out; just go back and read your blog; surely you will laugh it off and be happy. Thirdly, well thank the Lord Pat will be with you and thank God hes a big strong man cause you will not be able to overpower him when he restrains you. I remember only too well how it took 3 nurses and myself to hold you down for shots at the doctors when you were little....on the serious side WE LOVE YOU, WE ARE PRAYING for you and KEEP us posted on how it all went. xoxoxoxo from all of us.
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