For Rent By Owners

    My husband and I own a house in a small town with an apartment above the garage out back, both of which we rent out. Our apartment tenants had to move out suddenly and we were left scrambling to get it re-occupied at the last minute. So, last night I posted the rental online (complete with pictures, like a good landlady) around 10:00pm.... and in 24 hours I have had nearly 55 emails inquiring about the post! Now, why these 55 emailers felt it was necessary to explain their entire life stories to me was beyond reason.... Honey, telling me that you're on disability and going through a messy divorce with your 5 cats isn't exactly a selling point. Another fellow explained that he has terrible credit, but he's just looking for a chance to prove himself.... this is not the Oprah show. We don't do handouts, sir, please move on. Then there's the man that spelled just about every word wrong in his message. Call me passive aggressive, but I couldn't help emailing him back, saying that the apratment was still availlable and culd be redy bye Argust 1st.

    My husband and I decided to stagger some times in the next few days to show the place off to those wishing to see it (and there are many). We even had one woman offer to "make it worth our while" to move her application to the top of our list.... she's either loaded (I'm ok with a bribe) or twisted (please be loaded, please be loaded), but we will find out this weekend! I'm starting to think we may be asking too little for the place.... perhaps we should make an apple pie (who cares about the old realtor trick.... I just like pie), host an open house, and then I'll pull out a gavel and start the bidding at asking price, going up by $50 increments until all but one lucky renter folds (and if they have most of their teeth, smell decent, and their credit check proves worthy, we'll take them!) It may seem odd to have a teeth and odor clause, but we've learned our lesson the hard way. Come August 1st, we WILL have our place rented.... let's just hope our nutcase-repellant is working.